When I signed both boys up for swim lessons in FEBRUARY I started dreading it then. It is not easy. Coordinating two different classes, EVERY weekday for two week sessions at a location that is 35 minutes from our house. I grew increasingly grumpy all last week in preparation for this week. If I had known just how bad it was going to be, I would have decided I just needed to go ahead and be a lot more irritable.
DAY ONE: Monday
Make the 35 minute drive for Nolan’s class. Day one the swim instructor (Did I mention she taught my siblings and I how to swim when I was growing up and that she is known as the Swim Nazi?) tests the children to determine their skill level and places them appropriately the next day. Griffin and I are scheduled for the “Mommy and Me” class at 10:45. Upon arriving she decided to test Griffin at 10:00 as well in hopes I would not have to do the Mommy and Me class at 10:45! FINE BY ME! Once they are in the water Griffin starts fussing and whining for me. The swim instructor tells me to hide (we are only allowed to watch the first and last day). I promptly go hide behind a chair in which a mother was sitting. I could hear what was going on, but could not see. Griffin continues to ask where I am periodically and fuss at times, but makes it for the 30 minute duration. Ms. Margaret tells me at the end of the test session she was willing to try Griffin in his own class, but if he is disruptive, into the the Mommy and Me class he goes! I prayed really hard. I am so over swim lessons in which I must participate with my children!
For the rest of the day we talked to Griffin about how fun swim lessons are going to be. We talk about possible rewards he may receive. We all tried to think positively except Griffin who could have cared less.
Right before swim lessons in the waiting area
DAY TWO: Tuesday
Receive a call from Ms. Margaret at 6:00 AM to inform me Griffin was placed in a class at 11:30 and Nolan at 12:15. This was GREAT news as I feared and had been warned most likely the kids would not have back to back classes.
At 11:30 we arrive for Griffin’s swim class. Again we talked about the possibility of receiving this Angry Bird stuffed animal he and Nolan had seen at the Build a Bear Workshop if he worked really hard. I also promised we would decorate 4th of July cookies. Griffin went back with his class. (Side note: The parents sit in a covered and fenced in area on the side of the swim instructor’s house. She teaches in her own backyard) I hear crying. I am on pins and needles. I do not recognize the cry. I breathe a sigh of relief. A mother confirms it is her son. I text my mom that so far so good. About 10 seconds I later I recognize a scream. ”Where did my Mommy go? I want my Mommy!” I text my mom again.. “It is G. Hear him saying he wants me. Oh dear.” Two seconds later I text, “He is screaming.” I text again “Torture to listen to. Hate this. Guarantee this is not going to work.” About five seconds later I text to my mom “He is done. Darn it.” I saw Griffin standing at the fence with his towel and the instructor. The instructor informs me Griffin will be placed in the Mommy and Me class the next day.
Griffin proudly walks into the waiting room. He is thrilled. He got his way. I wanted to strangle him, but knew that would not be appropriate. 
We wait until the end of the class to talk to Ms, Margaret. The other child that had been screaming was removed too. Ms. Margaret wanted us to do the Mommy and Me class and then attempt his own class again in a couple of days.
I was so mad. This new class was going to interfere with my work schedule on Wednesday, meant there was a break between classes and meant I HAD TO SWIM WITH HIM. Did I mention I am so over that?
I cancel my 10:00 client for the next day, coordinate the new schedule with my mom, and remain very grumpy the rest of the day.
DAY THREE: Wednesday
The Mommy and Me class started at 10:00. I only cancelled my first client. I planned to finish swim class with Griffin at 10:30, be dressed and ready and drive to Addison (about 20 minutes away with no traffic) for a client at 11:00. I knew I was going to push it.
I pack up the gazillions of things I need for myself and the boys (change of clothes for all, activities to keep G busy during Nolan swim class, snacks, drinks, towels, suntan lotion, etc).
I drop Nolan off at my parents. Arrive for the Mommy and Me class (yeah!) at 10:00 praying I am able to stay somewhat “put together” while in the pool. At the end of the class Ms. Margaret suggests that I come back on Thursday for Mommy and Me (Yeah!) and then have Griffin try his own class once again after Nolan’s class. She suggests Nolan came in the pool with Griffin for support. We swim until 10:30 where then my mom meets us outside to change Griffin and go home for a whopping hour before she is back for Nolan’s class.
I leave still very wet because I certainly do not have time to dry off. Decide to change clothes behind an abandoned building and proceed to drive to my office while putting on jewelry and trying to towel dry the bottom of my hair on the way. I arrive at 10:56 for my 11:00 client.
My sweet mom takes the boys home and then goes back for Nolan’s class at 12:15.
My mom decides to take the boys to to the mall to buy each of them an Angry Bird later in the day. Nolan can have his right away for doing such a good job at swimming, BUT Griffin was going to have to earn his the next day by no crying, no whining, and swimming all by himself in his own class.
Griffin proceeded to whine and cry and beg for his already purchased, but did not technically own yet, Angry Bird all night.
DAY FOUR: Thursday
Once again pack up clothes for all three of us, snacks, activities, drinks, and so on. Leave at 9:15. For most of the 35 minute drive G and I talked about how fun swimming is, reminded him about the Angry Bird he would get if he swam in his own class, talked about making 4th of July cookies and so on.
10:00 Mommy and Me class (yeah!) Finish at 10:30 and drive to my parents house which thankfully is not far to change clothes and hang out for an hour. Upon arriving at my parents I realize I have left all of my stuff to get ready at home as well as heavy snacks since we would not finish until 1:30. Get ready using my mom’s things, race to get Mc Donald’s, race back to feed the boys, change Nolan into his swimsuit, change G back into his for a second time and then drive back to swimming.
Nolan has swimming at 12:15. During that 30 minutes I reminded G he was getting ready to have his own swim class soon. Nolan was going to go with him. I showed him the brand new Angry Bird that was waiting for him if he stayed for the whole class. Griffin told me I was going with him. When I told him that was not the case, he opted for his Mimi. I once again reminded him he was going with Nolan ONLY. I was not hopeful.
When it was time, I held by breath. Griffin walked right back with Nolan. The fence door closed. My heart was beating through my chest. (Oh and I must mention that one of my child clients is in Griffin’s (independent) class. Can you say somewhat awkward and meant I sat with the client’s mom for the whole session in the waiting area!)
That was the longest 30 minutes, but I am happy to report HE DID IT!! I briefly talked to Ms. Margaret at the end of class and she said he did great. She said Nolan sitting with him made a huge difference. She said she still wanted me to come back to the Mommy and Me class on Friday. Yeah! Of course that also means Nolan’s class at 12:15 and Griffin’s (independent) class at 1:00. Super excited let me tell you!!
We went back to my parent’s house to change clothes again. I decided the Angry Bird worked so well we went back to the mall on our way home to get the Angry Bird pig as an incentive for tomorrow. We left at 9:15 AM and got home at 3:15. Griffin is currently throwing a fit that he cannot have the Angry Bird pig yet until he swims really good tomorrow. The irony about what he is screaming? “I WANT TO GO TO MY SWIM CLASS!” Laughable at this point for me. Either that or cry.
Holding their Angry Birds
The Angry Bird PIg that awaits G tomorrow if he has another good day!
I still have to let them decorate 4th of July cookies today because I had promised this as a reward (and the boys will not let me forget) and get ready for tomorrow because guess what? I get to do it ALL OVER AGAIN tomorrow, but also add in physical therapy for Griffin at 8:00 AM and a pool party at our neighbor’s house starting at about 4:00 PM.
This swim session ends next Thursday, but here is the kicker. I have Griffin signed up for another session starting the following week.
The things I do so my kids do not drown astounds me.
Oh and I am thinking about taking up drinking wine
at 10:00 AM. All I am sayin’.